Giving birth and becoming a new parent during a pandemic has unique challenges. This blog is the second in a series that covers preparation for birth and parenting at this time - because with restrictions in place for many of our health services, the way you prepare matters more than ever.
This blog is part of a series focusing on how you can empower yourself ahead of your birth. There are currently restrictions on additional birth support in Sydney hospitals and you can expect staff to be working harder than usual with resources being stretched. You will need to be proactive in approaching your birth with knowledge and confidence, this blog series contains suggestions on how to do that. This part is focusing on the important topic of Partner Preparation and Support Tools.
Educate and inform yourselves as a team
Any good education will include how to support a woman in labour, what to expect and how to communicate with your care givers. There’s also lots of support partner reading out there (see my Resources page for examples) and I encourage you to give it a look. Partners go through their own journey and experience in the birth room and the more prepared you can be for it, the better.
Plan the birth together
A good birth plan has many advantages and the first of them is that it helps you both get on the same page. If you both know what your decisions are in different situations then you can communicate with the staff effectively and the labouring woman can let go, confident in the knowledge that you know her wishes and can filter much of the communication.
Pack the bags together
Most people in Australia birth at birth centres or hospitals - this means that there are bags to pack! Packing them together means that if the birthing woman wants anything, you’ll know how to find it in your bags quickly.
Practice the drive to your place of birth
There are 2 drives that a partner remembers in their life. The drive to hospital when labour has started and the drive home with their new baby in the car. Practice the route, consider if different roads are better at different times of day, where the parking is, whether there is different ‘out of hours’ access etc. You do not want to be working this stuff out on the day!
5 Senses - see, hear, taste, smell, touch
Environment is very important to a woman when she’s in labour and its helpful for the support person to consider the 5 senses when setting up the space. There are lots of things you can do to help soften a room:
Sight - what does the room look like? Keep the lighting low and the layout inviting
Smell - our sense of smell is strongly connected to our memories, bring familiar things from home and maybe use pregnancy safe essential oils
Hear - you can listen to music, affirmations, meditations - whatever feels right at the time. For music I recommend putting together a few playlists that have different qualities, calm, energetic, inspiring - whatever you like!
Taste - fluid and snacks are so important! Labour has your body working pretty hard over a sustained period of time so staying nourished and hydrated are great ways to support the process. I’ve honestly seen a labour turn around with a cup of apple juice. Snacks, jelly snakes and coconut water are great options.
Touch - this is connecting and distracting and can help a woman produce endorphins that help lessen the intensity of her contractions. Learn a few different touch techniques and practice them during pregnancy.
Use your ‘brain’
In childbirth education we talk about using your ‘BRAIN’ to assess recommendations from your care givers during pregnancy and birth. This is a great framework to remember, especially when the situation might feel stressful and unclear. ‘BRAIN’ stands for the following:
B - what are the Benefits of your recommendation?
R - what are the Risks, now and in the future?
A - what Alternatives are available?
I - what does my Intuition say? So, how do you feel about it?
N - what if we do Nothing, or nothing right now? So, what if you wait for a while and try something different to see if it helps.
How to advocate (more on this in my next blog)
Only the birthing woman can accept or decline the recommendations but support partners can have a role in advocating for the decisions that you’ve made together. A birth plan is especially useful in this, the support team can advocate for the plan but not speak for the woman.
Good communication with your care givers is an important part of the day - and is the topic of my next blog in this series.